Pastoral Thought--June 30

As the rain and thunder roll down this afternoon, and I found a little ‘anxious’ shih tzu, the one who is afraid of thunderstorms, running around me feet,  I noticed the words of the book that I was reading. They stopped in my mental tracks and invited me to gaze into rainy afternoon and wonder if the author, Richard Rohr, is correct in his assertion?

He is what he wrote in his book The Universal Christ: 

At this point, at least in the United States, it appears that our cultural meaning has pretty much shrunk down to this: it's all about winning. Then, once you win, it becomes all about consuming. I can discern no other underlying philosophy in the practical order of American life today. Of itself, such a worldview cannot feed the soul very well or very long, much less provide meaning and encouragement, or in gender love or [build] community. 

When I read Rohr I find that his wisdom and perspective on the issues that affect the church are right on point. There is deep wisdom in what he says and writes. When he looks at the culture of the day, Richard sees something that most people could see, but they choose not to acknowledge. Using my analogy of a rainy day: they might gaze out into the rain and wonder what about a specific topic, but they don’t push that learning very far. 

So as I sat and thought about Richard’s words, I hoped that he was wrong. The optimist in my heart sought a contray point to defeat the argument. Is it really all about winning? . . . and then all about consuming? Is there nothing out there besides those two concepts that drive our thoughts and our actions? 

As I sat in silence and considered what I just read, I began to realize that for me in that moment I was consumed with winning the argument—and not listening to what he was saying. I was consumed with proving my worldview correct and defeating his. I wanted to prove that things are better than Richard believes and then construct a proof to validate my argument.I am correct. I have universal perspective and my opponent is missing something. Yet again that is a stance of winning and not one of listening.

So I placed his book in my lap; it will be there later when I want it. Then i re-read the paragraph that I cited above. I just sat with it. . . As I did so the remainder of those words came into focus for me. If you and I are attempting to build community and help our larger community find spiritual meaning in their lives with God, then perhaps we are being called to think and interact more gently with them. As they are consumed with winning and consuming, my practice of listening, without winning, might be what helps them create joy and find God. 

But we have to be willing to listen and help others do the same. . . I wonder if we will? 

Blessings

Rev. Derek 

Pastoral Thought--June 29

 Today I want to be a bit vulnerable with you as we ’talk’ today. Perhaps the struggle that I am going to share, the one that confronts me now, is also something that confronts you in our life and in your mission for God? 

Let me explain. . . 

Tuesday is often a quiet day around the church. Over the summer the ‘quietness’ becomes even greater. Tuesday is the day when I am alone in the office of the church. Ann, our regular office administer, takes Tuesday off—as Jodell did before her. So without the children of CNS across the hall, and with Ann gone, the building becomes a bit spooky in its silence. But I have a way forward in the silence. . . .  I combat that silence with some background music and it helps.

I have an entire playlist catalogued of background music that I rely on often in these times. This music helps me to think; it drowns out the silence of the room and the humming of the air condition that Rich and Jay put in my window a few months ago. I find myself more creative and more productive when there is not just total silence around me but something to hum to. But today those sounds did not help me. They only drew more attention to what was wrong this morning. 

I clicked through several of my favorite musical selections: EPCOT Master Mix, Disney World entrance themes, a couple of favorite restaurant mixes, nature sounds. Nothing helped me find clarity and focus. 

About that time, I finished my coffee and picked up the book that I use as part of my morning routine. Leaning back in my chair, I placed the book on my chest so that my bifocals wound fully magnify what I was reading and make the reading simpler to follow. After about a page, the struggle was getting worse. (Now here’s the personal part that I promised….) I noticed the buttons on my shirt were a bit stretched as I turned the page and that bothered me. I love this shirt because it fits well and breathes nicely on a hot day (which today is). But it was tight across my stomach. 

I adjusted it for a better fit and tried to read some more. . . This time I felt my belt digging into my side. I smirked and moved from my desk chair to my favorite reading location. Still I was not comfortable. I slipped off my flip flops onto the floor and tried to find some peace by rubbing my toes on the carpet to stretch them. Still I was uncomfortable, and worse yet, I was very aware of it. 

Over the next hour I tried a number of things to make myself more comfortable and with no positive results. Finally, I walked home in the heat of the later morning, and changed my clothes. I donned a cotton shirt that I bought from Edinboro University, grabbed my favorite pair of cargo shorts, and my running shoes. No sooner did I have a fresh cup of coffee in my black cup, then I noticed that I already felt better. Did a quick change really make that much different? And so I ask you: 

Was it the clothes that made me uncomfortable, did they fit wrong or too tightly, or was it my mindset that affected me? 

You see there are a lot of times in our lives when outside stimuli affect us so much that we are completely paralyzed by them. No one means for them to affect us so negatively, but they do. I was completely unable to function because my shirt felt too tight and my belt was uncomfortable, but I’ve worn that exact outfit last week and had no issues with it. Instead of pressing into who God is in my life and how I can work to be more faithful to God’s calling with me, I was annoyed. Distracted. Unable to function. At a loss creatively. I wonder if you know what that feels like? 

And if you did, which I suspect, then perhaps take a moment to notice where is God in your mind when you struggle with something that seems unnecessary? Perhaps you and God are about to have a breakthrough. That might just mean you need a different pair of shoes…

Blessings

Rev. Derek

Pastoral Thought--June 28

 Monday is a hard day for most people; some think that Monday is the hardest day. 

As a people, we make a lot of jokes when we are together about being unable to ‘roll out of bed’ easily as Monday begins. More than just the first day in a new week, Monday often symbolizes the end of the time of weekend rest and the return towards a life of over-crowding and over-working. Often this is not an intentional choice that we make, though. I don’t wake up on Monday morning and think, “I hope that today I over-work myself and am totally exhausted both mentally and physically at dinner time.” But sometimes my choices and my behavior would say that I am seeking, and that I desire, overwork. 

And I am not the only person struggling with this attitude or choice today. 

As you may have discovered recently if you’ve been following my pastoral thoughts, the works of Thomas Merton have been in the front of my mind for some time now.  I believe that Thomas offers the church some much needed guidance and counsel as we leave behind the covid-quarantine and live again into God’s mission for us and for the larger church. Today I offer you these words: 

There is a pervasive form of contemporary violence to which the idealist most easily succumbs. . . overwork. The rush and pressure of modern life are a form, perhaps the most common form, of its innate violence. To allow oneself to be carried away by a multitude of conflicting concerns, to surrender to too many demands, to commit oneself to too many projects, to want to help everyone in everything, is to succumb to violence. This frenzy. . . Neutralizes our work for peace. It destroys our own inner capacity for peace. It destroys the fruitfulness of our own work, because it kills the root of inner wisdom which makes work fruitful.

If you find yourself agreeing with Merton’s words then I wonder what would it look like to lay aside the temptation to be busy and press too hard in life? What would happen in your morning if you just sat with God and God’s word, even for just a quiet moment, and let that speak to you and guide you through the busyness that is awaiting you after you finish reading this thought? 

The way that I dealt with this temptation today was to take Luna for a long, very hot, walk. The heat zapped much of her strength and passion early on as we circled the church to warm-up. Only about fifteen minutes into our walking time, I noticed that she was not pulling so hard. This meant that I was sale to head down Plains Church Road with her. Her stride was smooth and she was in rhythm. As she walked a few feet in front of me, I found space to just listen to the world around me on Plains Church Road and Hope Road. I found space to dwell with God. . . And God said nothing to me. We just walked side by side. 

When I returned home very sweaty and tired, my list of things to do was still there and still growing. I was 45 minutes behind schedule for the morning. But for a briefest of time, they did not matter. I knew that each of these needs sought my attention, and I would give them what they sought in the right order, but I left the frenzy go and my Monday started off differently. 

I wonder what might happen for us as the church if we lived in the same way? 

Blessings

Rev. Derek

Pastoral Thought--June 24

 I wonder, what do you think that God is doing in your life right now? 

This is not a question of deliberate action only, but one that if we stop and consider can be far deeper and more meaningful than we first considered. What is God doing in us right now. . . in this exact moment? For most people believe that God is at work in their lives right through an action, or a place, or a ministry, or even in a spiritual gift that has been given from God to us. In this case God’s activity is on4e of productivity and it is transactional. God shows up to do something and then we take what God has done and we continue the work. While I agree with this idea a some level, I wonder what if God’s movement today in your life is smaller? 

By smaller I do not mean less significant, but instead, something so easily forgotten or neglected that it is hard to consider that God is there at all? Can God be at work in those moments or places or instances too?  

Jim Finley believes that God arrives in our lives in these ’smaller’ out-pouring just as much as God is present in the big life-altering moments. His line of thinking has greatly helped the church live faithfully with God. He believes that: 

“God is perpetually creating us breath by breath, heartbeat by heartbeat. . ." 

What a phrase! What an idea! When I read those words this morning I could not help but stop what I was doing (as I invite you to do right now also). As I stopped what I was doing I tried to notice how I was breathing. What was its rhythm? I listened to my breath for a few moments. As I listened to how I was breathing, the raspy breaths and the slower ones, I noticed my heartbeat bringing blood to my body. 

My heartbeat was moving my shirt ever-so slightly. Since my heart surgery I have always taken time to notice how my heart works. The combination of breath and heartbeat brought forth in me an interesting place to dwell for a moment. . . . 

I came to the occlusion that God is active in the place and space. God is continue to mold and shape me as the potter shapes the clay again and again. I am a work in progress and am happy to confess this. I wondered then if God is active between my breaths and heartbeat what then does that say about God’s level of care for me daily? Hourly? Minute by minute? 

If God is creating my life as I breath and as my heart beats then running to the bank this morning before work, stopping at Costco later for shampoo, having a talk with JonMark about his next semester of school, is important. This then becomes not only a place where I can witness to the movement of God in my life, but it becomes a creative space where I can invite God to come and continue HIs perfect work of creation in me and in you.

I hope that you will take some time today to notice your breath and your heartbeat. . . Then as you notice them, notice how God is continuing to create and shape you.

Blessings

Rev. Derek 

Pastoral Thought--June 23

 Oh boy…. This has not happened to me before. 

Last evening, I went to Target to run a quick errand after our neighbor and Rich helped me fix Jennifer’s car. This was the same errand that you have run countless times—just a quick ‘in and out.’ My first stop was the pharmacy for a pickup. Sadly it was after 8pm so they were closed. I smirked and thought ‘wish I checked the time before leaving the house.’ But I  continued onward walking toward my next stop in the back of the tore. They did not carry the item that I needed either. I thought, ‘well this is a pointless trip.’ About that time I received a message from Jennifer. It read: 

“While you are out something sweet would be nice.” 

Say no more. . . I can get a sweet-treat! I walked back across the store to the grocery area and selected some Dove chocolate to share with Jennifer, JonMark, and Autumn (who stopped by for dinner). This trip was not unlike many other trips I have made in the last week. Nothing special and nothing to report that is life-altering.  Until. . . As I rounded the final main aisle and headed toward the registers things changed. I walked past a family who was not in a hurry; I did not mind. Honestly, I walk faster that a mother pushing a cart with a child in it. This did not strike me as noteworthy and so I kept walking briskly toward the door. But then, about 20 yards in front of me, I saw a older man appear by the school supplies. He looked back and forth across the store. 

He was not old in a traditional sense. He seemed vibrant, alert, and outgoing. This man was not lost in any sense. His white hair spoke about his age but did not mark him as unique or different. He made eye contact with me. Then looked over my head while gazing off into the distance. Then as I got closer he again made eye contact. As I got within ear-short the man said something—but I did not hear him. My AirPods were resting comfortably in my ears as I walked through Target.  I smiled and clicked off the show by squeezing the “Pod” in my left ear. Simultaneously I smiled and said, “sorry, I didn’t hear you.” Taking another step toward me he began to ask his question again; this time with less conviction. He broke off in mid-sentence, his eyes noticed the rest of my outfit. This is an important detail in our story today and speaks to why he engaged me. 

You see, I was wearing gray sweatpants and flip-flops. But I was also wearing a bright red shirt!. . . Like an employee! 

He looked down at my shirt and finished his thought, “Guess I confused you with someone who works here.” 

 

I replied, “No problem.” As I turned I saw his wife walking toward him with ’that look.’ You know the one. It's the, ‘Oh honey, who are bothering now’ look. And I walked away to resume my evening. But why? 

This man needed some guidance. He was looking for something, and l likely knew where to send him. I have shopped at Target more times than I can count. I would rather go there than any other store around Cranberry. I might just have the information that he needed in my mind. Even if what he was looking for was obscure, I could get him into the general area. Yet, I kept walking. I could help and yet I did not help. 

The closer to the registers I got the more convicted I felt. Sure, it is not my job to help every stranger in a retail establishment find their toothpaste, or a loaf of bread, or dish soap. But what would it have cost me to try? What harm would have come from taking a moment to see if I could help a stranger in a store? Maybe I could and maybe I could not. I had nowhere to be that was emergent. The two extra minutes would not even be noticed in my evening. I had the space and the time, but not the desire.  

As I started up the car and backed out of the parking spot I wondered: How many times do I have the choice to engage a person, in what could be a meaningless conversation, but is in fact a conversation that God brought forth? How quick am I to ‘click’ my AirPods on, or find another distraction, and by doing so I miss the chance to witness for Christ, through my actions? 

I guess that I will never know what could have been. But the encounter gave me reason to pause. I wonder what would happen when you have the same choice presented to you?

Blessings

Rev. Derek

Rev

Pastoral Thought--June 22

 In an essay entitled, “Meditatio Pauperis in Solitudine,” Thomas Merton wrote the following text for us to consider today. 

Now before we read these words together I offer a word of caution to you as Merton’s audience. Reading and considering Thomas Merton can be quite challenging if your mind is distracted. We often read at a certain pacing or tempo. There is a rhythm to most of what we read that we follow easily. This tempo or this rhythm is how we can sit with a favorite book and not recognize the passing of time. 

But Merton resists that construct and process. To read Merton is to be forced to slowly consider what he is saying. Reading Merton often requires us to stop in the middle of a thought or sentence and consider it gently. For his sentences are complex and his language reads slowly. This is to say nothing about how we interpret what we read from Merton’s writings for we can find a depth behind the words that we might miss upon the first-reading. 

So I encourage you to re-read Merton’s words again. Read them slowly. Take a moment and consider them again and hold them in your heart throughout the rest of the day. In the essay, whose title I began with, Merton writes: 

“You have called me here not to wear a label by which I can recognize myself and place myself in some kind of category. You do not want me to be thinking about what I am, but about what You are. Or rather, You do not even want me to be thinking about anything much: for You would raise me above the level of thought. And if I am always trying to figure out what I am and where I am and why I am, how will that work be done? . . . Because I no longer desire to see anything that implies a distance between You and me: and if I stand back and consider myself and You as if something had passed between us, from me to You, I will inevitably see the gap between us and remember the distance between us. My God, it is that gap and that distance which kills me.” 

One of the great challenges in our lives and faith is finding time to sit with God for no other purpose than to ’sit with God.’ Most of my day and practices speak against this type of thinking, but that does not mean that we should not re-examine them or ourselves. Like you, I am a person called to action and choice in my day. There are things to do and I often believe that I can take God with me into those tasks. 

But do I truly take God into those tasks? Do you? We know that God is there, but is God part of that moment or action? 

This morning before I headed over to the church I needed to stop at the grocery store for coffee, milk, cheese and a few other things. I turned off Jennifer’s car and grabbed the keys. Slipping out of the door, I neatly placed my AirPods back into my ears and continued the podcast that I began while driving. The subject of the episode was in fact Thomas Merton. I thought to myself, “why not take Merton’s words with me into Wal-Mart." Thomas would provide a necessary distraction while I shopped. But for the life of me, I cannot remember a single thing that the speaker said about Merton or about Merton’s text. . . . I am guilty of too much multitasking. 

With the best of intentions I listen to something that I hope will bring me closer to God. And yet no matter how hard I try, I cannot multitask my way into a deeper union with God. Like Merton, I feel the distance between God and myself killing me, and yet, do I make the effort to just ’sit with God’ or ‘be with God?’ Do you? 

I wonder as you read, and re-read, Merton’s words from above, if God might be inviting you to notice the places and times when you too have created the space between yourself and God, and that space too great? I wonder what choices you could make today to bring that gap closer together. . . maybe something what Merton wrote might be helpful? 

Blessings

Rev. Derek

Pastoral Thought--June 21

My attention has been held today on something that Emma found after church. Let me take you back to Sunday later-morning. . . 

After church, before we headed to the fellowship hall for lunch and strawberries, we stopped in my office to put down my ’stuff.’ The bulletin, my coffee cup, and my keys were laid on the desk next to my iPad and we went to the basement together. On the way out Emma’s eye caught hold of something sitting on my coffee table. She frowned as she looked at the pair of coffee cups that she potted recently for me. Inside of each cup was a succulent that was given to me by one of our CNS teachers at the end of the school year. As we did not have any planters at the time, Emma wasnt sure what do with them for me.

However, one thing that we do have is a plethora (which is not an understatement) of old Disney coffee cups. She took the cups and gently trimmed the rotted roots of the plants off and repotted them for me. She gave me simple instructions: 

1- “Dad they are cactuses, so don’t water them too much.” 

And

2- “Make sure to give them plenty of light.”

Flash back to Sunday and Emma was staring at a succulent with white, puffy, mold on it. “Dad, what did you do.” She asked. Honestly, I have no idea what happened. I haven’t watered them much and I thought that my office had plenty of light.  Upon reflection I can say that my office is a bit darker that a normal room and I do remember watering the one in question a bit too much recently. Upon my confession, Emma gave me a serious look and threatened to take them away from me. I shook my head and said I would handle it—and I have. 

This morning, I put them both in the classroom across from my office. It is very sunny there in the morning. I opened the window so the warm breeze could dry them out. Within an hour or so, the moldy cactus looked a bit drier and healthier (it actually did). As the sun crossed the sky I moved it out onto the window sill so that warmth could keep doing its work. It will take some time, but I know  how to ‘fix’ this. I will need to be attentive to my poor succulent but it can be saved.

So my morning and afternoon has a different pacing to it. 

About every so often, I wander into the other room and look at them to see how they are doing. I have been doing this all day. . . This choice has affected how my day has unfolded. 

As I walked back into the office after checking on them a short while ago, I wondered: what simple things do we deal with that seem to monopolize our days? These are things that should not be that which holds our focus but yet they are important to us at a deeper level, and so we divide our attention for them. I wonder what might happen when we acknowledge that we practice and live this way? I don’t want us to throw these things out or dismiss them as tools of distraction because I do not believe that. For these things, like my succulents, hold an important place in our lives and so we should not disregard them. But what happens if we acknowledge that fact and use that learning to inform how we choose to orient our days?  

I wonder if we might find out something about ourselves when we make that discovery…..

Blessings

Rev. Derek