Pastoral Thought--September 3

What happens when we feel disappointed?

From my perspective, this is a personal question with personal responses needed after diligent time with God is spent. It can also almost feel like a daily question that we are faced with. But nevertheless it is also a question that I think each one of us can say that we have faced in the not too distant past. Recently, I was confronted by an individual who felt, and experienced, a deep sense of disappointment in someone that they cared for—a close friend, in fact. 

This friend made, if I can offer a brief judgment, a less than optimal choice given the situation they were placed in. And so, when the choice came to light in the relationship of these two people, so too came a sense of disappointment for them, frustration grew in the moment. . . and ultimately a sadness set in over both of them. Not sadness between friends, because they are quite close, but a sadness between what happened, and what could have happened. As far as I know, these two individuals are still friends and will remain so for a long time, but. . . disappointment has entered the relationship and that cannot be denied as if it didn’t happen.

I wonder if you know what that feels like? And if you know what it feels like, can you speak to it? 

Novelist Eliza Tabor wrote about disappointment this way. She says:

"Disappointment to a noble soul is what cold water is burning metal; it strengthens, tempers, intensifies, but never destroys it.” 

As I reflected on that disappointment story that was shared with me, my hope for both of these people was that their relationship with continue progress, continue to grow in a Godly manner. I know that it might be a bit of a challenge in some circumstances for these two, but if Tabor is correct, and I think that she is, then this is an opportunity for each of these two to be strengthened, intensified, and grow together. It is not going to be easy all of the time moving forward, but if they do so in Christ, and in bounds of friendship, then I believe that their disappointment can be resolved in much they same way our disappointment moments can be navigated through.

So I go back to the first question for today: What happens when we feel disappointed? 

I hope that when those moments or feelings come into your life that you will see it as opportunity to come together with that person. To love them. To support them. And to know those feelings don’t have to end the relationship but they can be a way that you, God, and that person move forward.

Blessings

Rev. Derek