I Wonder--April 18

There are times when praying is easy; when it feels joyful and joyous. 

Bowing your head at meal time, or lifting it up when the blessings of God reign down upon you and those whom you love and care for, that is wonderful. It feels amazing and when I find myself in these moments I cannot help but smile when I consider how much God loves me and how closely God can be felt.

However, how do you pray when your are overwhelmed? 

How do you find the words, and what do they sound like, when God feels distant. You remember that God is never distant--you've learned that your whole life. You remember that it is only we who move away from The-God-who-died-for-us. God remains steadfast; God seeks relationship with us. But still in that moment the words don't come.

We have all been in that place. . . So what does prayer look like in that place? 

Kate Bowler and Jessica Richie wrote these words to you when you find yourself in the space where the words do not come easily and God feels so far away. They wrote: 

"Blessed are we who pour out to you (O God) the whole of it--unedited--all the terrible truths and fears and what-ifs." 

In their words, I found something helpful. For I too have been in the place where words do not come easily and all I want to offer God is the unedited words of a prayer said not in love but in frustration, in anger, in confusion, in isolation. 

But you know, God honors those prayers too because they come from a place of honesty and trust. 

This is the lesson of Job for the church. Job trusted God enough, I believe, to be that honest and that open with God. He was willing to give God the unedited parts of himself and believe that God would not reject him. 

I wonder if perhaps that is a lesson for you today when prayer becomes harder than we might like. Can you trust God with the unedited parts of your life and believe that God is listening?